I’m not sure why I have never “met” my sister yet I feel her absence.
I’m not sure why I hold on to things like a clothes hanger that she wrote her name on.
Some days I don’t want to read my Bible- I read hers and touch the verses that she highlighted.
I’m not sure why when I had my daughter, I felt closer to Joni, yet my heart yearned for her even more.
So much good has come out of Scarlett’s birth.
If you are unaware of the story of Scarlett’s name here it is:
Because of PCOS I was told at 17 that I would probably never conceive a child.
At 21, I found out I was pregnant.
I always knew that if I had a little girl some part of her name would be Joni, a tribute to my sister.
Brad and I could not determine a first name for her.
I prayed and asked God to give me a name for my daughter.
Brad texted me one day and said “Scarlett”.
Something in my spirit confirmed that it was the right name for her. I still doubted that the name was from God.
After Scarlett was born I took her to altar to pray over her digestive issues. In that moment God used someone to tell me where Scarlett’s name came from.
In Joshua and in Hebrews is the story of Rahab tying a Scarlet cord in the window to signify that her and her whole household would be safe.
Scarlett signified that PCOS didn’t have me defeated and left childless. She has been my healing in more ways than one. God had named her, he just used Brad to do it.
Through Scarlett and her middle name being Joni, it has been a passion of mine to involve our family in the Joni Washington scholarship and other things that keep her memory alive.
Most recently, I received a message about a pair of Joni’s band pants that were left 24 years ago at a friends house. I picked them up a few days ago.
The presence of God was overwhelming on the ride home. Sometimes when you lose people, even the smallest of things prick your heart the most.
I still can’t answer the question as to why I don’t have an earthly sister and why I long so deeply for that relationship but I know God cares for me and my heart to put these pants in my path 24 years later.
Until we meet again, I will cherish the small things- like the sisterhood of these traveling pants. ❤️